Yvonne Goss
Monday, December 4, 2006 at 7:28PM BIO
Hello, I sing with a traveling gospel group called New Vision. I have been with them for 10 years now. I feel that God put me in that group to be able to share my story and my song with others. I have written a song about abuse called "Be A Voice", written in January of this year. Its something that God gave to me after I prayed and cried out to Him as to what I could do to help children that are suffering the same abuse that I suffered with growing up. My goal is not only to help survivors with the words to my song, but to try and make a difference in the lives of future victim's of abuse. My sisters and I prosecuted our father back in 1999 for the abuse we suffered. As hard as that whole process was, I think it was another chapter in our healing. Its also where the song "Be A Voice" came from. I have such a strong desire in my heart to help children now. I think that the little girl in me is the motivation for that. I pray that God uses me to help others. I feel that in writing and sharing my life I am being a voice for my sisters and I, for fellow survivors, and most importantly, for the children. In order to let them know that they are not alone and that there is a trusting hand out there for them to hold. Q & A 1. What is your favorite coping skill? 3. What was the worst piece of healing advice you ever received? 4. What were the three hardest obstacles to overcome? 5. Have you ever hit "rock bottom"? What kept you going? 6. What does forgiveness mean to you? 7. When did you know that everything was going to be okay -- that you were going to make it? 8. Is there anything that you would like to say to someone just beginning their journey? 9. If there was one piece of advice you would give, or one thing you would want the significant other, best friend, etc. of a survivor to keep in mind through out the survivors healing process, what would that be? POETRY Chorus: 2nd verse:
My name is Yvonne Goss. The story of my sexual abuse started before the time of reason I was told. My three sisters and I were molested by our father from toddlers until our teens. I truly do feel that focusing on who we are now, and where the journey to healing has led us, is far more productive than reliving the abuse that we endured. I am a survivor. For many years I still thought of myself as a victim. And in doing that, I wasn't able to heal. My abuse was something that I never talked about. Only a part of my past that I wanted to block out. It wasn't until one of my daughters was molested by a Sunday School teacher that I had to look at my childhood, and face it. In doing so I believe that I have gone from a victim to a survivor.
I married my high school sweetheart when I was 17. He has been my knight in shining armour. We have been married for 23 years now. We have 5 daughters and the kind of life and home that I always dreamed of. God has truly blessed me with my wonderful family. I love to see just how much my husband loves his girls. It makes my heart dance to see a father's love like that.
I have several really, but the one I use most often is just to focus on something really wonderful in my life....for me its my husband and my girls. They are my life. When past thoughts come, or present situations remind me of my past, I focus instead on them, and it drives the other thoughts away.
2. What was the best piece of healing advice you ever received? >
I haven't really had too much advice from one source. From what I've read from other survivors though, you have to look at it for what it was....and get past it. There's no way we can go back and save the child we were back then. We can however try and save the next one.
That would have to be from a counselor that my sisters and mom and I spoke with right after the trial with our father. She told me that it was great that we were talking about our story but to be careful who we tell it to. Some may not understand and look at us differently. At the time she told us that, we were still in victim mode I believe, because had she said that to me today, I would have responded and not taken the advise that she had for us. I am NO LONGER ashamed of who I am, or of who I was.
My self confidence and (feeling not as good as others) issues are still there, but not as much as they used to be. Trust would have to be the hardest for me by far though. I was married to my husband for more than half our marriage before I was able to confront him with just how bad my trust issues were. I had them with him even where my girls were concerned. In doing that though, and getting past them, our marriage is even stronger than before.
Yes, during the trial with my father. I regressed back to the "inner child". I had a breakdown I guess you would call it. I had so much rage surface that I believe I had held down my whole life My faith in my heavenly daddy kept me going though. At one point, I just didn't want to live anymore. The pain was just too strong to relive. God gave me several songs to get me through that time though, and I sing them now to try and help others.
I feel that forgiveness is something that we do for ourselves more than anything. I had been told all my life that at one point I would have to forgive my father if I ever wanted to heal fully. I'm not sure I can forgive what was done to me as a child, but I have come to accept it, and have gotten past it. He shows no remorse for what he did, and I think if he did, maybe things would be different.
I think when He gave me those songs. The song "Faith" was one that talked about me being at my lowest point. How I just couldn't see a way out of what we were going through at the time. But I see now that Faith really can get you through the rough times. He's Been Conquered is one that gives me a sense of triumph. That we were able to conquer something that we never had thought we would be able to face, or talk about even. I really think my healing started with "Be A Voice" though. It helps keep me going in knowing that I can make a change for others that I didn't have for myself. I want to do that so very badly. It is a strong driving force inside me. I want to do what I can to, not only shed more of a light on this to ones that just don't understand, but to also change the world that children are forced to live in.
Find a solace for yourself. Whether it be with your faith in God or with someone you trust. Get into a group, or counseling. Some place that you feel safe. Someone that you can share your feelings with. Realizing that you are not alone is such a help. And knowing that you will come out a survivor is what kept me going down that road which I thought was just too hard to travel at times.
See past the abuse they suffered. Be the person in their life that they have longed for all of theirs. Be someone they can trust. Someone they can lean on. Try to look at life though the eyes of a survivor. Do some research, and find out just what a hard journey they are traveling in the healing process. Most of all....JUST LOVE THEM THROUGH IT.
1st Verse:
There's a painful truth in our world we've got to face.
For too long, we've ignored their desperate cry.
Please consider the cost, another innocents that's lost.
We have to speak for the children, be their voice
Be a Voice for the ones with no choice.
Forced to live in a world they cannot change.
Be a light in their darkness, a trusting hand that they can hold.
Be A Voice for God's children, be a voice
Can you hear the voice of the innocent cryin' out.
Rescue me, from the evil all around me.
And make my world as it should be, a loving home where I can grow free.
Rescue me, break the silence, be my voice.
Chorus:
Be a Voice for the ones with no choice.
Forced to live in a world they cannot change.
Be a light in their darkness, a trusting hand that they can hold.
Be A Voice for God's children, be a voice
Tag:
Be a comfort to the innocent, the pure in heart, the meek.
OH we have to speak the truth, only the truth will set them free,
Chorus: Yvonne Goss LETTER In His love, Yvonne :) BE A VOICE!
Oh Be a Voice for the ones with no choice.
Forced to live in a world they cannot change.
Be a light in their darkness, a trusting hand that they can hold.
Be A Voice for God's children, be a voice
BE A VOICE,
Bring His light into their darkness,
BE A VOICE,
It's never too late to make a change,
BE A VOICE!
Jan '06
I am writing this letter to any child out there that has gone through or who is going through sexual abuse. First of all I have to let you know that you are STILL that precious, innocent child. Nothing can ever take that away from you. What you have gone through or are going through now is NOT a reflection of who you are. I want you to know that you have the right to BE A VOICE for yourself! You have the right to be treated the way a child should be treated. To be loved unconditionally. To be protected at any cost. I want you to know that you have the ability to change the world that you live in. No matter who is abusing you, be it a stranger, teacher, or a family member. You have the RIGHT not to be abused or mistreated. I'm begging you to please, please find someone that you can trust and tell. And if they don't believe you, tell someone else. And you keep on telling until someone hears you. If you want to write to me, I PROMISE YOU that I will not only believe you, but I will do everything in my power to help you. Please believe that there is hope. There is a life out there that you deserve and are worthy of. Telling someone is the key to unlocking that door. Give yourself a gift that you deserve. Give yourself the gift of freedom. Tell someone, please!
We have the most important job that was ever given to a human being on this planet. That is the job of being a parent. The children that God in trusts us with, depend on us not only for their survival as young ones growing up, or to be loved and protected. But also for their very make up of who they will one day become as adults. Too many fathers and mothers abuse the privilege of being a parent. They treat the gift that they have been given so carelessly. My entire being aches for those who have parents that are too selfish to think above their own needs. Those that would harm a child for their own pleasure. Those who would neglect a child and put themselves above that trusting child's needs. Whether you are a survivor of any kind of abuse; be it physical or sexual, or if you were blessed with loving, caring parents, I'm begging you to stand with me, and lets make this world a world that is worthy for the innocent. It's our job as human beings. Start by being the kind of parent that your child deserves. And second, don't turn a blind eye to those children around you. Love them, protect them, and cherish them for the precious gifts that they are!
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